At least you get pregnant, they say.

Sometimes the path of your journey has dark moments, only to unveil a bright and glorious day.

You might have read an old blog post of mine titled 14 Things I want you to know about infertility that nobody talks about. If you haven't read it, check it out here. In this blog post, #8 reads,

 I hate when you say, “the good news is, you can GET pregnant." Or, "You get pregnant easily/often/a lot", etc.

Let me just set the record straight. That's one of the worst things to tell a woman who has just found out she lost her pregnancy. Never say that, or anything remotely similar, to a women who likely carrying a baby with no heartbeat, whose remains would be surgically removed the next day.  

Okay, getting off my soapbox.

Here's the thing, people don't know what to say - they either say nothing or they say something stupid, like the above. My own family members and my doctors told me this exact thing on more than one occasion. I know they were trying to help but it didn't make me feel any better.

Why does it bother me so much?

Here's the thing, I use to wish I had trouble getting pregnant, then at least I wouldn't have to endure the emotional and physical pain for losing multiple babies. Then it hit me...... 

PERSPECTIVE. 

That's what years of infertility and 12 miscarriages brings you. And boy, is it convicting. 

I wrote a blog post awhile back about reframing your perspective. I recently went back to read it and was reminded that God gave us emotions to experience life, not to destroy it.  

So while it's annoying to be reminded I can indeed get pregnant, I have 12 babies in heaven and 1 on this earth to prove that statement, it's also a reminder that my infertility situation could be ton more challenging than it is. There are plenty of couples out there who struggle with things in their fertility journey that I take for granted.  

My hope for myself is to continue to allow the emotions God places on my heart. While it's annoying to be constantly reminded that I can get pregnant, perhaps that's God's way of reminding me to reframe my perspective.